Breath and Life

Okay. I’m going to say something weird. Ready? Here goes.

It’s hard for me to believe I haven’t always existed.

Like, there was a time (a LOT of time!) in which I wasn’t born. I didn’t exist.

I feel so real and alive (I am, and I am!), so how is it possible that there was a time in which I was neither thing!?

I know it’s true, obviously. It just blows my mind.

Me, a person with deep thoughts and genuine emotions and dreams and hopes and fears and a heart that beats and pumps blood through my body… I haven’t always been! I wasn’t. And then I was.

Only God could do that- create us from nothing. And He chose it all- the date and time and location of our birth.

And it might seem irrelevant because everyone has a birthday and was born in a place and so how is my birth-date and location of birth significant at all? But it is. He says it is.

None of it is accidental or by chance. It was planned. Purposed. It matters. I matter.

We didn’t choose to be here. We didn’t will ourselves into existence. Our parents didn’t even will us into existence because how many parents who struggle to get pregnant would have children if it was a matter of WANTING them?

We, humanity, really has very little to do with it.

So why do we think it all depends on us now?

I didn’t always exist.

It’s not up to me to hold it together.

I didn’t always exist.

And when I think about that, how I came to be through none of my own doing, I realize how fragile life is- how we’re here one day and gone the next. And again, not (hopefully!) by our own doing.

Our days are numbered. It’s all in His hands. It has always been. He who tells the night to fade into day; He who tells the leaves to fall; He who keeps the world spinning on its axis; He who numbers our days.

And as real as this seems, as real as I feel, there’s more.

I haven’t always been and this world won’t always be. And that doesn’t have to be scary. Rather, it’s a reflection of the God who is working all things together for good- the God who has a plan.

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